I sit at my writing desk, looking out the window at the bushland beyond. Rain was forecast. Instead, we have the usual dry ground and stillness in the air.
This week I realized that COVID 19 restrictions have erased the ‘softer touch’ people interactions that counterbalanced the demands and responsibilities of my work, homeschooling, and maintaining the haven I call home. Gone are the sparkling eyes, laughs and ‘ocker’ banter of the Vietnamese lunch bar proprietors; gone are the smiles on the fresh faces of young women, in 50’s attire, hair bound with scarves, at my favourite cafe; and gone are the unexpected encounters at the local supermarket with characters I recognize from my working-class neighbourhood. Small interactions that provided a counterbalance I didn’t have to rally to my overwhelmed mind are now missing.
I know that the mediator to all experience is my thinking. Pre COVID 19, there was enough ‘wiggle room’ awareness of what I was hosting in my mind to let go of ‘angsty’ thinking when it arose. But things are different now. With the COVID 19 restrictions, I have lost those nurturing, interactive moments that effortlessly ignited positive thoughts to warm my heart and maintain my proximity to inner contentment. Now, my public and sometimes working life ‘living landscape of people interactions’ is more often tense and abrasive. Without the everyday ‘softer touch’ people interactions, my ‘wiggle room’ has silently departed and my mind has meandered into the wilderness.
How to counteract what I now see so clearly?
An overseas friend, a terrific, warmhearted woman and a kindred spirit (living in much tougher circumstances than my own), has suggested we videoconference for an hour, once a week, just to take time out, to talk about how we are going, to listen and to laugh. Imagine how different life could be for many if we initiated the same with one other person and invited them to do the same with another. Two hours a week to consciously spread care and warmth. An act of kindness that it is so needed by those who live alone and don’t have the buffer of another caring adult in the home. I already have my ‘one other’ in mind.
My second commitment is to say hello and to smile at all those I pass as I walk my dog and ride my bike. Partners walking their golden retriever, terriers, and dachshunds, and fathers helping their little ones to ride small two-wheeler bikes now regularly appear on the firebreak bordering the Australian bushland across the road from my home. All wave from a distance and say hello. State housing commission tenants imbibing from large Pepsi or Coca Cola bottles on their front porch also say hello. These small acts have lifted my spirits. I intend to ‘pay it on.’
I also notice those blogs, videos, tweets, pictures, and posts that calm and nurture versus those that further intellectualize or deliberately manipulate our lived experiences of life under COVID 19. The latter creates a ‘tighter’ feel within. They don’t reflect the breadth of thought we experience and nor do they align with all that makes us human. Vast expanses of joy, sorrow, laughter, compassion, anger, and fear roll, like thunderous waves in a storm through our psyches. Narrow apertures can not contain nor shape the truth of our inner worlds, and nor do they provide the balance that ‘softer touch’ interactions gift to peace of mind. Instead, they take us further away from inner contentment and add to an increased sense of unnamed angst. We need counterbalances that reflect a fullness to life. My final commitment is to feature ‘softer touch’ moments I encounter, ones that automatically ignite the heart, and nudge angst on its way. The sparks that resonate with being fully human needs fanning.
Rain now falls outside.
Last night my daughter and I went to see the feel-good movie, Little Women, at a feel-good venue, 
Whilst eating, a warm-hearted young lady came by selling tickets as part of the cinema’s fundraising efforts. Every night, for the duration of the summer program at 4 cinema outlets, volunteers sell tickets, run the food and drink outlets, distribute beanbags, show the film, clean up and probably much more than I am aware of. They are amazing and their generous spirit makes a huge difference to the feeling that permeates each screening. This young lady went on to tell me that she volunteers three nights a week at two of the outlets plus she volunteers at 
Some time ago, in a mentoring session with a client, the client broke down at the thought of a family member’s unthinking remark. What I initially brought to that moment was what I have seen about the innate existence of wisdom in us all and how it played out in that scenario. The activity of innate wisdom is my slice I have seen deeply. Other West Australian practitioners most probably would have responded differently based on their own deep insights. 
Before understanding gravity and its influence on planets and tides, ancient people thought the planets were pushed around by angels and that supernatural forces governed the tides. People’s thinking was out of sync with the natural phenomenon of gravity. And from that thinking, misaligned behaviours followed. Ancient peoples, not understanding the earth’s rotation and movement of the planets, used to light fires on the horizon to attract the sun back each day. They were afraid it wouldn’t return.
There is one point at which the path diverges, the path to the right taking a more meandering journey closer to the lake’s edge, whilst the one straight ahead melds through a grove of beautiful ghost gums. I always take the path to the right because I think that path is the longer route. Whilst my daughter believes the one straight ahead is the longest.
Decades ago, when I was first exposed to the inside out understanding of how we create our experiences, my very first ‘different’ way of thinking about things was to see my thinking as ticker tape crossing my mind. I was doing the dishes at my kitchen sink and could see my thinking moving across my mind as ticket tape. It was the first time I could see my thinking separated from ‘me’.
When it comes to young children, I’m not sure we can ever really ascertain the ‘trigger’ for the shift in their thinking that creates their insecurity, or really whether it makes any difference. What we can do however is to quieten down in our own minds, do whatever we can to reestablish a secure feeling and listen to what surfaces within ourselves that feels like the right thing to do. Maybe holding them in our hearts, trusting what comes to us in our quieter moments and following through is all that is needed. Maybe the solution to all monsters, imagined or real, is love and the wisdom that comes from it.
A man sat on a bench under a tree casually eating fruit, whilst a woman sat at one of the iron tables writing notes in her journal. Two men in wheelchairs and their carers enjoyed a coffee in the middle of the garden whilst another group of skinny males, garnished in dirty jeans and black windcheaters, hands shaking as they tried to hold their take away coffee cups, tried to light the cigarette stubs in their hands.
Georgina Mavor 